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Tough Love (1979) Part 4
Chapter 4 The Return Although I knew it was wrong, I couldnâ??t be the one to tell Michael that Cooper was in the house again, and I wasnâ??t about to be around to HEAR either. â??Mmm, mmm, mm, m!â? â??What?â? â??That was one fine boy. How old is he again, Clarence?â? â??Who? Cooper?â? Clarence laughs, â??Heâ??s just twenty-two, you cougar.â? â??Hmm, he legal,â? she laughs. I just go upstairs, not wanting to hear this nonsense. â??Oh Lyric, by the way, you gotta call someone. Their birthday is today.â? â??â?¦.Oh! I gotta call Grandma Rebecca.â? I know I just called Angelaâ??s mom, Janice, but my dadâ??s momâ??s birthday is four days later. Sheâ??s basically a year older than my other grandma, and both of them are Capricorns. That speaks A LOT about those two. â??Yeahâ?¦I thought you forgot about me.â? â??I hadnâ??t! Iâ??ve just had a busy day!â? â??Whatâ??s up with you?â? â??What?â? â??Youâ??ve been distant since we got back. Can I have some time with my friend again?â? â??Sure. Like what?â? â??Letâ??s hang out at my house tomorrow for a few hours. Janet and Bruno and the rest of the gang misses you.â? â??You had me at letâ??s hang out at your house. Sure Michael, Iâ??ll go.â? â??Great!â? So it was like old times again!! Just me and Michael, riding out, cruising in his Rolls Royce to his house; to his Hayvenhurst. I hadnâ??t seen the family since, since Christmas Day. And I didnâ??t see all of them! The last time they saw me, I was on my crutches with the cast on my leg. â??I see sheâ??s feeling better!â? Katherine exclaims when she first sees me. â??I thought you forgot about us!â? Janet says as she holds up Bruno to me. I cuddle with Bruno for a moment before I answer Janetâ??s daunting statement. â??No Janet, Iâ??ve never forgotten about yâ??all. Iâ??ve just been going through some thangs.â? I smile, but indeed, it was the truth. Then I turn to see who else was in the room. Randy was standing off by himself. â??Well arenâ??t you going to hug me?â? I teasingly ask him. I donâ??t know why it seems like when Iâ??m around Randy, I always have to be extra-nice to him. Itâ??s like I have to convince him that he matters to me. Just because Iâ??m always around Michael, I guess Randy THINKS I care about him less. But the truth is, I really donâ??t know him that wellâ?¦.And right now it seems a little bit too late to be worrying about thatâ?¦with Nick and all. But right now, thatâ??s beside the point!! He graciously hugs me. â??Something about you is differentâ?¦maybe the widening of the hips.â? Katherine laughs at her own joke, â??I mean I donâ??t even say things like that, but thereâ??s a type of glow to you. I hope itâ??s because youâ??re happy to see us again!â? I laugh with her. â??Right!â? I say real quickly before hugging her. I donâ??t need them thinking itâ??s something else!! Even Joseph was happy to see me again, and I hugged him. It just became a big joke though, when Jermaine walked from another room with Jay and the rest of the brothers trailing behind him. They were treating it like it was about to be a big confrontation because Michael and his brother was in the same room with me again. â??No kicking or hitting below the belt!â? Tito jokes. â??Oh shush Tito,â? I say before hugging him. â??Rebbie called yâ??all while you were in Hawaii, right?â? â??Actually she didnâ??t,â? Michael tells her. â??Hmm, she mustâ??ve forgotten.â? â??I know I wouldnâ??t have.â? I look over at LaToyaâ??s smug expression. â??Well Happy New Yearâ??s to you too, LaToya.â? The family tries to hold in their snicker as they see me just lose my cool in-front of them. Oh shoot! She just rolls her eyes and turn away. When I go in their living room again to look at more family photos, Randy follows me after a little. â??Hey, I know we donâ??t celebrate it, but I gotâ??chu a little present.â? â??Yeah? That reminds me, I forgot to give Michael his!â? and I didnâ??t really get the family one because I assumed they didnâ??t really celebrate it. â??I hope you like it..â? â??I like them!â? heâ??d given me some aviator glasses with goldish-silverish lenses. â??How do you know I like these kinds of glasses?!â? â??Michael has said it once when he was talking about you.â? â??Ohâ?¦â? â??Yeah..well I hope you like them..â? As Randy turns on his heels, I stop him. â??Randy?â? â??Yeah?â? â??Why didnâ??t YOU ask me to go to Hawaii? I mean why havenâ??t YOU reached out to me..if you like..if you LIKE me, that is?â? Randy shrugs as turns around. â??First, we donâ??t know each other that well; and TWO, I didnâ??t think you would go with me. And I donâ??t think I wouldâ??ve taken it as far as Hawaii like my brother did.â? â??Oh,â? I lean my head to the side. Because of Nick, I couldnâ??t offer Randy a date like I naturally wouldâ??ve. â??I was just wondering.â? â??Iâ??m sure you were.â? Then he walks out again. â??Thank you for the gift!â? â??No problem!â? he says over his shoulder. â??Whatâ??s up?â? â??Randy gave me some shades!â? I wave at him as I fakedly smiled at Michael. It still bothered me that MICHAEL took me to the island and not RANDY because heâ??s the one that likes me. I mean, not that I wouldâ??ve wanted to be alone with him in Hawaii, but the fact that he didnâ??t step up and did something with me during the holidays is what disappointed me. I mean it made me feel that he didnâ??t care enough, so shoot, I took a free trip to Hawaii with Michael. â??I see them!â? Michael takes them from me and puts them on my face. â??Fabulous!â? I got to bond even more with the family as we sat to have a snack together. OF COURSE we dished on different stuff that happened while we thereâ??like feeding the homeless, which Janet beamed at. But of course the fact the Jermaine invaded on our trip WASNâ??T brought up. And then for the rest of the time I was there, I mainly played with Bruno in the backyard. Itâ??s not like Iâ??m Dr. Dotlittle, but itâ??s like Bruno and I have telepathic magic between each other because this dog SERIOUSLY bonds with me. Iâ??ve only connected with two other dogs like thisâ??first, my cousinâ??s dog, Lucky, a female Golden Retriever, whoâ??s passed on now, and then another Chihuahua, named Callie. She has sadly died too, so thatâ??s probably why I connect with Bruno so much. â??Hey, I think itâ??s time to go, unless you want to hang out with Bruno some more.â? â??No,â? Bruno licks my cheekâ??cute but ewe at the same time! Do you know that dogs CLEAN themselves sometimes?!. â??Thatâ??s fine. Câ??mon Bruno,â? I stand up as I leveled my hand down to Brunoâ??s tongue. He leapt to touch it as he followed us into the house. â??I guess itâ??s now my time to leave.â? â??Why so soon?â? â??Mother, weâ??ve been here for a while. Iâ??m sure Lyric has some other stuff to do.â? â??Like what?â? â??Yeeaah, like what?â? Marlon and LaToya says. â??Stuffâ?¦â? Michael sketchily says. â??Right,â? Katherine says. â??Well honey, you know youâ??re free to come here ANY time. And tell your mother and handsome father I said hello.â? I began to laugh. Katherine is on a roooll today. â??Okay!â? â??Youâ??re not coming inâ?¦again?â? I ask Michael as I unbuckle my seatbelt and notices he isnâ??t getting out. â??Yeahâ?¦Iâ??m working on the album with my brothers at the house.â? â??And you couldnâ??t just gotten me a cab?!â? â??I donâ??t believe in cabs! Now I had to make sure you got home safely.â? â??Whatever Michael,â? I roll my eyes. â??See you later Mr. Sneaky!!â? â??Yeah whatever.â? Then I watch him back out the drive-way as I waved him goodbye. I walk into the house with a HUGE smile on my face! First, Iâ??ve connected with the Jacksons again! I havenâ??t FORGOTTEN about them! I mean, I just feel damn good!! â??Lyric, honey?â? â??Yes Dad?â? And though I hate to acknowledge it, I just called Clarence â??Dadâ? again! â??Come in here sweetie.â? I walk into the kitchen as I see itâ??s a bit dim. I look up. Oh shitâ?¦itâ??s M.J. again. I blink twice to make sureâ?¦and itâ??s himâ?¦itâ??s not a dream. I see he did something a little different with his hairâ??heâ??s shaved the sides a littleâ??and heâ??s decked out as usual! Heâ??s wearing a black shirt with a black leather jacket on and a gold chain. Then heâ??s wearing jeans with some tennis shoes. Heâ??s really have his OWN style. And as he has his closed-tooth smile, he looks soâ?¦humble with a glow. DEFINITELY a change from what Iâ??m used to!!! He walks over to me as Iâ??m trying to catch my breath again. M.J. hugs gives me a firm caring embrace. Although I didnâ??t RETURN it. Then he hands me a single rose. â??Surprise Lyric!!â? â??Whatâ??s going on?â? I look over at Dad. â??A surprise dinner that M.J. had set up for us. Then my hard eyes turn towards M.J. again. My initial thoughts were like: WHAT? You came back here for your stuff? â??Cause you can take you shit back. I donâ??t want it!! When he hugs me back, I say in his ear, â??Do you want your stuff back?â? He just laughs. While everyone else was dressed to the part, I look down at my casual black sweater and feel underdressed. â??Please, let me take that from you.â? M.J. gets me jacket and then we go to the dining room, which we never use, and hangs my jacket on the back. While sitting there, I sort of desperately looks at my mom and dad. M.J. walks back in and out the room with dishes. I see he mustâ??ve fixed lasagnaâ??one of my favorites. When it was time to say prayer, I didnâ??t want to hold his hand. So I was a little slow at grabbing his hand. While he was saying the prayer, I kept my eye open as I just COULDNâ??T believe he was talking to God because of the way heâ??s treated me. â??Well, dig in!â? And we do. Well they do. I just pick at my food a little. And ohh, itâ??s SO good! If it was cooked by ANYONE else, I wouldâ??ve eaten it. Well anyone else, other than Dylan Cooper too. â??Well this dinner is mainly in-between you two; weâ??re just here.â? Dad points in-between himself and Mom. I nod. â??Iâ??m sure you wanna know why heâ??s here.â? â??YEAH. I DO.â? â??Well,â? M.J. wipes his mouth then he turns towards me. â??I felt we really didnâ??t connect that much over the break, and I just wanted to have a formal dinner with my girl.â? Then he winks as he turns away again to get a forkful of lasagna.â? I could tell he improved that part. It just came out that quick. Mmm, I thought. â??Yeah, why WERE you so distant?â? Dad asks. M.J. takes a breath, â??Well, I wanted to give her some time to relax and just have time with her family,â? he even SOUNDS calmer. â??I know we hung out a lot when we were first dating, and I just didnâ??t want to smother her.â? Like you HAVENâ??T?!! BEFORE! â??Ohh.â? Then the dinner turned into some interview. At first I LIKED that, because I wanted M.J. to be drilled. To be honest, I didnâ??t even want him in my HOUSE! Heâ??s giving off this false notion that weâ??re still together again, when we really ended it December 29th of last year. Then another stab wound, on my grandmotherâ??s birthday. â??What made you cook for us?â? â??Well.â? Oh goshâ??not this suave connotation again, â??I think itâ??s IMPORTANT to cook for my girl and her family sometimes. Just to treat them to a nice dinner. I cook with my mother a lot, and sheâ??s given me some of her cooking secrets, so you know, I hope you enjoy it!â? â??Yeah! I need a second dish of lasagna! Lyric knows how much I love lasagna!!â? â??Then thatâ??s good maâ??am.â? He smiles at her then me again as he kiddingly bumps his elbow into mine. I give a quick smile then stop again. â??So what plans do you have for the future? What about schools you want to go to?â? â??Well sir, UCLA is DEFINETELY in the works. Then Iâ??ve been thinking about Stanford too.â? â??What do you want to be?â? â??A rapper.â? â??Hunh?â? â??A rapper sir. I have a way with words.â? â??Well that, you do, son.â? Oh gosh, now youâ??re calling him â??sonâ???! Iâ??m not even with him ANYMORE! I wasnâ??t laid up with him on New Yearâ??s Eve!! â??Itâ??s just something Iâ??ve always been into. Now it seems I can go to school on a basketball scholarshipâ??Iâ??m not too fond with baseball as I am with basketball, and that shows in my skillsâ??so Iâ??m thinking I can go to school for Literature or something, then continue my writing. In fact, Iâ??ll major in music or something.â? â??Is that so?â? â??Yes sir.â? â??And how does your FATHER feels about it?â? M.J. takes another breath. Yeah Dad, way to STICK IT to him!! â??Well he doesnâ??t support it sir. He treats it like Iâ??m the only one who does this, but the truth is, rap has been around since the beginning of time it seems. Iâ??ve learned that itâ??s been around in West Africa even before we were born. Itâ??s just a type of music where you present poetry over a beat.â? â??So how do you think youâ??re going to take care of yourself with rap?â? â??Well sir, Iâ??ve got things to say. Iâ??m a deep person, so I have deep things to sayâ?¦Speaking of that, do yâ??all mind if I perform a song for yâ??all?â? Oh God, not THIS again! â??Sure, go right ahead!â? M.J. walks in the living room and gets what he needs. I do my best to avoid my parentsâ??s eyesâ??thatâ??s IF they were looking at me. When he comes back, he puts this disc on our record player. Then I hear the keys of a piano. â??Un uh, dun duh. Un, uh, dun duh.â? Oh no, not THIS again. Now heâ??s performing â??4 Letter Word.â? â??Four letter word Four letter word Four letter word Four letter word You make me wanna sing to you(oh oh) (Yeah) Itâ??s the little things you do for me Hold me lover friend I can spend my life with you(oh oh) (Yeah)Girl we aint got a thing to loose So lets go and runaway It's you and me Never gotta worry cause we always got eachother Like the sun to the sea Girl you got me feeling yo waves Your my four letter word Four letter word My four letter word Four letter Your my four letter word Four letter word My four letter word Four letter You can be anywhere in the world but your here with me cause your my four Letter word (and I'm your) four letter word (Woahhh)â? He was getting all in my personal space. If we never had that argument then it wouldâ??ve worked. But I kept thinking, â??Humph, Iâ??m with Nick now. Well at least occupied, so get your things and LEAVE.â? And then M.J. was sneaking behind my chair. He only got closer as he delivered his second verse. But I gotta say, it was NICE to hear him sing than rap for once. Heâ??s really got a nice vibrato, and his voice could go a little lower than I thought. It was nice hearing it. It was as if I was the only person he was performing for. And I guess in a way..I was. I guess he was true about the â??no matter whoâ??s around, Iâ??ll show you affectionâ? part because my parents SURELY were there. Then the â??my parents and your parents think this is only temporarily because weâ??re only teensâ? part really made it seem like he was sticking it to him. Then with the bridge part, he was close to my face as if he was about to kiss me. But then I did my best to keep my head away, which was really hard. Then he got on his knees for the rest of the song and hugged my waist at the end. They clapped as I stood still as a stone. I think I even looked drained!! â??By the way, how much older are you than my daughter?â? M.J. scoots back to the table. â??Well my birthday is March 21st.â? Did he just dodge that question? â??And what are you mixed with again?â? â??Well my birth mother is Mexican, sir. Itâ??s not always obvious to people unless I tell them.â? â??Oh. And that song was really good! I wasnâ??t sure how youâ??re father would feel about it, being that heâ??s a preacher, but that was good. I liked it. I think my daughter did too.â? Then he points at me as he has a closed-tooth smile. Everyone turns towards me. I still canâ??t fix my expression that much. But to be honest, I was too afraid to excuse myself for a minute. I thought Iâ??d break down. â??But M.J. said he came over to ask us something.â? M.J. straightens up as he clears his throat. â??Yes sir, I did.â? M.J. takes my hand, and although I wanted to snatch it away, it really seemed like it was going to be somethingâ?¦important. And YES I hate to say that. â??I wanted to ask that next weekend from Friday until Sunday, could Lyric go with me and my family to this church conference being held in my dadâ??s home state, Texas.â? â??Why so far?â? â??Well it was going to be in New York, but luckily it was moved to Texas. We were going to go to this seminar with other pastors about how to make the church better so we could make our communities better. Itâ??s our fresh start for 1979, and since Texas is such an attractive state, well we couldnâ??t turn it down.â? â??â?¦â?¦.â? I could hear pins dropping on the carpet as Dad rubbed his chin. Mom had breathed in. I could just TELL they were communicating mentally. Usually they wouldnâ??t care about me travelingâ??if it was for SCHOOL, and maybe with the Jacksons. But NOT with a boyfriendâ??or a formal boyfriend. â??My mom has already had the bedrooms set upâ??strictly the girlsâ??s room, and my father and I would share a room. Weâ??d be sharing the hotel with other church families, so it will be a â??family, safe environmentâ??.â? He moves his fingers as he says the last part. â??Whose idea was this?â? M.J. looks down and begins to blush as he looks up again. â??Well to be honest sir, it was mine. I know how spiritual and charitable Lyric is, so I knew she would be the person. Plus my parents told KiKi, my sister, and I that we could invite one friend to go with us.â? â??Is your sister inviting someone of the opposite sex?â? â??No sir, sheâ??s a girl around our age.â? My dad nods. â??And Lyric will be available to a phone if needed.â? Dad just keeps nodding his head, then stops and thinks some more. â??Well thatâ??s if LYRIC wants to. I glance at M.J. again then at Dad, WONDERING why heâ??s AGREEING to this! â??I mean, I think itâ??s a neat idea. Your boyfriend trying to get you even deeper into the church. Not that Iâ??m disagreeing because my momâ??s a Baptist too,â? then he winks at him. â??Maybe heâ??s not such a knuckle-head after all.â? Then he laughs again. Heâ??s not even my BOYFRIEND anymore! â??You think this is alright?â? then I glance at Mom. â??Well you were on the island with Michael and were safe there, right?â? She asks. But I could tell she doubted this a little too. â??I mean, while yâ??all two werenâ??t around during the break, weâ??ve had a dinner with M.J.â??s parents, and theyâ??re decent people.â? It seemed as if they were cheering me on!! Or actually wanted me to go! Under their eyes, I said, â??Iâ??ll think about it..I guess Iâ??ll go.â? â??I mean thatâ??s only if you want to; donâ??t feel FORCED into it.â? â??I DONâ??T! Iâ??ll go.â? I look at M.J. again and give a fake smile. â??Sounds like itâ??s going to be fun.â? Then M.J. hugs me. I could tell he was sweating bullets because he had taken his leather jacket off before he performed, so I could feel his sweat under his shirt as he hugged meâ?¦ â??Donâ??t worry about the dishes. Youâ??ve done enough, and that peach cobbler was incredible, so Clarence and I got the dishes. Yâ??all go out on the porch or something.â? Thatâ??s what we did. He held the door for me as I rolled my sleeves up so I could get some internal A.C. or something. Because I knew I was about to cuss M.J. out or something. He leans against the rail, but I keep walking until I got on the grass. And I never do that. After he notices I ainâ??t coming back to the steps, he follows me. â??What the hell do you think you are doing?â? He laughs a little. â??Lyric, Iâ??ve changed. I miss youâ??I can tell you that. December 29th and on have been hell for meâ??â? â??Whose fault is that?â? â??Okay, I deserve that. But man Lyric, I was just so conflicted with the fact you were plan on being on an island with another man for TWO weeks, and then I felt you were flirting with other guys. I guess you donâ??t think I pay attention, but just like girls, guys get jealous too. Iâ??ll confront you just like youâ??d confront me.â? â??But Marvin, you CURSED at me. THEREâ??S A DIFF-ERENCE. You NEVER let me tell my side. You just jumped to conclusions.â? â??You never told me about the Christmas party either.â? He shrugs. I blank out for a minute, then I bunch up my eyebrows. That was so long ago! â??What are you doing, checking up on me?!â? â??Letâ??s just say I have a bold-ass source.â? â??Who is it?â? â??Thatâ??s not important.â? â??WHO told you about the beach partyâ?¦and now the CHRISTMAS party?â? â??I canâ??t.â? â??I wonâ??t go to Texas with you.â? Then I cross my arms. He stares at me. I never move or blink. Then he takes a deep breath. â??Alrightâ?¦.â? â??And you better not lie either because Iâ??ll be able to tell.â? M.Jâ?¦.well â??Marvinâ? to me still, kicks the grass, takes another breath, and with his hands in his pockets, he say, â??Nick.â? For a moment I just stand there, â??What?â? â??I asked around at first, but then when I asked Nick, HE was adamant about both the beach party and Christmas one. It was like he didnâ??t care that we were together at first; and then even after, he was smug about it. Nick didnâ??t care.â? I take a sharp breath, â??WHICH Nick? You know thereâ??s about ten of them that goes to our school, and I think all of them goes by Nick.â? â??Take a wild guess,â? Marvin immediately says. â??The one that has a CRUSH on you?â? â??â?¦.â? â??Yeah, THAT one. Gatsby. Nicholas GATSBY.â? â??Well whatever,â? I shrug my right shoulder. â??It still doesnâ??t excuse the way you were actingâ?¦.And I DONâ??T wanna be with your friend, Ray Ray. You know you gotta lot of nerve, M.J., I mean Marvin, Jr.; coming around here trying to impress my parents, but Iâ??m not buying thatâ??,â? then he leans in and kisses me. When he backs away, my eyes are big. I was going to slap him until I looked over at my house and thought about my parents looking through the window. â??Well s'a deal is a deal. You said if I TOLD you who gave me that information, youâ??d go to Texas with me and my family.â? I just walk away then and roll my eyes, but then he gets my wrist again, wraps his arms around my waist, the kisses me in the mouth. When he pulls away again, he gives me a soft smile. â??Looks like you miss me too.â? I tried pulling away from our embrace. â??Youâ??ve just kissed me the way you used to when you really wanted me. I mean my attention, Lyric.â? â??Get away from me.â? I just shake my head. When we go back in the house, Dad is standing outside the kitchen. â??Well looks like sheâ??s going to Texas with us!â? â??Is that so?â? he puts his hands on his hips. â??When do yâ??all go back to school?â? â??Like January 15th or 16th.â? I said in a disinterested tone because I really WAS disinterested. First, I find out my ex wants me back, then I find I guess my â??boyfriendâ? sold me out for his own good, and now my ex thinks I want him backâ?¦Uggh! M.J. just comfortably sits on the couch and talks mainly to my father about the details of this â??tripâ? next week. I donâ??t even feel good about it. He was waiting for his ride. â??Yeah, Iâ??ll call your parents tomorrow or Iâ??ll see them in person, so let them know.â? And he winks again. When he Mom or Dad rolled up, Dad asked if I was going to walk him out. Mom and Dad waved at the van real quick before going back into the house. While on the porch, Marvin suddenly stops, gets ahold of my waist again and kisses my lips. â??Canâ??t wait. And Iâ??ll see you at Ray Rayâ??s party.â? I didnâ??t even smile. I was confused with Nick anyway. Even though I didnâ??t want to walk him to the van, I did just to be polite. I waved and said hey to his mom. But I really didnâ??t feel like talking to her because I didnâ??t want to seem like M.J. and I had mended our relationship. I donâ??t want to go back there. When there care disappeared, I felt like a heavy weight was lifted off my shoulders, or better yet, chest. That was until I faced my parents again. Michael comes back shortly, but before he got there, I told them not to mention it because I wanted to tell him myself. â??Yeah, M.J. was here for a little while. Heâ??s just leaving and itâ??s ten something. Yeah, well Iâ??ma get my shower out the way. Remember donâ??t tell Michael.â? And when I was getting my pajamas, Nick calls. â??Hey, I just wanted to chat a little.â? â??Hey, um Nick, Iâ??m busy right now.â? â??I wanted to tell you what time I planned on picking you up tomorrow.â? â??Iâ??ll call you tomorrow, Iâ??m busy right now.â? â??Well okay. Sleep well.â? â??Yeah, good night.â? â??Iâ??ma miss you,â? he squeaks.â? I sigh, â??Hope you do. Bye.â? â??Bye.â? And as Iâ??m in the shower, I just shake my head at the nonsense of these boys. Huuugh, they keep my blood level high. By the way, I donâ??t recommend that. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Sooo, what did ya think? Itâ??s going to make sense..trust me!
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