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Not your average mj story! part 5

When michael came home he could tell something was wrong with me. after all i was losing weight.
Michael:(walks in and gives me a hug) hey baby
Me: hey sweetie i missed you so much 
Michael: i missed you too. have you been ok you know after um wat happened
Me: um... yeah i guess
Michael: can we go see here. i mean i feel so bad. i didn't get to spend time with my daughter
Me:(tearing up) yeah well if i would have been watching her she would still be here
Michael:(holding me) baby don't say that. these things happen sometimes. there was nothing you could do
Me: if you say so
Michael: sweetie are you losing weight
Me: um.. no.. i mean maybe
Michael: what's going on
Me: nothing michael
That night we made love for the firsst time in months. it was beautiful. he touched and kissed me gently. the way he looked into my eyes made my heart melt. we made love for 4 hours and  then we finally went to sleep. i woke up at like 3:30 am and michael was sitting in ayanna's room crying.
Me: baby what's wrong
Michael:why did this happen to us
Me:(sitting beside him) oh michael please don't cry
Michael: i should have been here. i should have been protecting my little girl. i'm a bad father.
Me: michael it's not your fault. i was the one that should have been watching her. i was here
Michael:(silent)
I wipe michael's tears away and try to get him to do back to bed. when he finally does i go downstairs to the studio and cry my eyes out. i feel so bad. i feel like i let michael down. i take like 16 anti depressants and over dose. the next thing i know i'm in the hospital and michael is standing oer me
Michael: thank god you woke up
Me:(smiling)
Michael: wat in the hell were you thinking. you could have died. i could have lost you.
Me: michael please dont yell
Michael: i'm sorry i just was was scared you were going to die. i mean i already lost my daughter
Me: im sorry i dont know wat i was thinking
Michael: how long have you been doing drugs
Me:(i turn my head)
Michael: carmen answer me
Me:(crying) since ayanna died
Michael: why would you do that
Me: i dont know. i thought i killed our baby and i felt alone. i thought you were cheating on me with that chrissy girl
Michael: so you dont trust me
Me: yeah i trust you but you were talking about her so much and you even brought her to the house
Michael: i didn't mean to make you feel that way but you should know i'm not going to cheat on you
Me: yeah i know
Michael:(just staring at me)
Me: can you hold me
Michael:(smiling) yeah (he kissed me then wrapped his arms around me)
Michael: promise me something
Me: wat
Michael: promise me that you won't ever do this again
Me: i promise
Michael: i love you 
Me: i lvoe you too

TO BE CONTINUED! SORRY ABOUT ANY SPELLING ERRORS! LOL

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