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Not your average mj story! part 4
hey guys this story is dedicated to michael,mimi,sarah,brittany,and someone else but i don't know her name but i will find out sorry lol! remember to hit me up on that email address! I couldn't talk to michael about the baby anymore so i just went to bed. I still wasn't sure if i wanted to keep it and i wasn't sure if i could trust him. I didn't even know if i still felt the same way about him. The next morning michael decided that we needed to talk and he was taking no for an answer. Michael: we need to talk Me: ok talk Michael: cj please don't give me attitude and don't make this harder than it has to be Me: ok michael Michael: i want you to keep the baby Me: but wat if i don't want to Michael: why wouldn't you want to Me: oh i don't know maybe because i can't trust you. Michael: oh please. you can trust me and it wasn't like i really cheated on you because we weren't really together Me: so... Michael: exactly. that's all you can say. you know i love you and i want to be with you so why can't you just accept that Me: i don't know michael i really don't know Michael: well think about it Me: ok Michael:(getting up) i love you Me: i know Ok now i know i was wrong for not saying i love you too, but i just can't right now and i think michael knows that... I decided to keep the baby and now im 4 months pregnant. my hormones are driving me and everyone else crazy. one minute im happy,then sad, then i'm angry. and on top of that i'm huge. Michael let me pick out the stuff for the baby and i hired a designer to do the baby's room. I think i was a total bitch throughout that whole process lol. Michael and i have been working on our relationship and i feel like i can trust him again, but i still haven't gotten back into the habbit of saying i love you. one morning when i woke up i was terrified. Michael was not breathing... Me: michael sweetie wake up Michael:(not breathing) Me:(shaking him) michael... michael wake up please wake up I start screaming and two of his body guards run upstairs. Ted: what's wrong Me:(crying) michael is not breathing call 911 Ted calls 911 and john goes and gets the nurse that michael has at the house and she starts to do CPR. I sit there and pray that micahel will be ok. We get to the hospital and the doctors save michael. They don't know wat caused him to stop breathing though. Me: michael im so sorry. im such a bitch. you take care of me and i can't even do the same for you, but michael i love you i really do (crying) Michael:(wakes up) stop crying i'm fine Me: you're up. i'm so glad you're ok Michael:(smiling) i wasn;t really asleep Me:(laughing) so you heard everything i said Michael:(laughing)yep Me: you are so evil Michael:(smiling)i try Me: i love you Michael: i love you too I look into his big brown eyes and i knew there was no absolutely no reason for me not to trust him. When michael came home i was a nervous reck. Even though i was pregnant i still tried to keep a close eye on him and he thought that was funny. Me: michael are you ok Michael: sweetie im fine, relax (laughing) Me:(laughing) im trying baby Michael: come sit next to me Me: ok(i sit down) Michael:you are huge(laughing) Me:(smiling) wow you make me feel so much better Michael: i'm sorry. you're still beautiful Me: thank you Michael:(kisses me) i can't wait until we start the tour Me: oh yeah i forgot about that. did you find some dancers yet Michael: that's wat we are going to do tommorrow Me: oh ok that should be fun Michael: i hope so The next day michael goes to find dancers and i sit home and eat lol. he comes home kinda late so we just get ready for bed. Me: so how did it go Michael: it went great Me: did you find any good dancers Michael: yeah. there is this one girl who is amazing. her name is chrissy. she is good Me:(rolling my eyes) oh really Michael: yeah. i think i watched her the whole time Me: that's nice Michael: are you ok Me: yeah I hate hearing him talk about other girls. it sounds like he likes this girl a little to much. When michael finally started rehearsals he was staying out late and he even brought that chrissy girl home a few times. we even argued about it a couple of times. i finally had the baby and we named her Ayanna. Michael was so happy he didn't even want to go on tour but i told him t go. He had only been gone for a month before my life shattered into pieces.Ayanna died in her sleep and i didn't understand why. As much as i wanted micahel to be with me and as much as he wanted to come home i told him not to. I got together with his family and we had a small funeral. I was so heart broken and i felt like it was all my fault. i had no one to talk to and i turned my attention in the wrong direction. i got addicted to drugs over the time period michael was gone! TO BE CONTINUED! ONCE AGAIN SORRY ABOUT ANY SPELLING ERRORS!
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