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Madfe me Better--6
When I got up to get ready for the video I had to straighten up a bit I smoked a little piece of my crack before heading out, God why are drugâ??s my only outlet. Well when I arrived to the set Michael was getting his hair done. I walked in and he seen me in his mirror, boy didnâ??t I feel like shit. Michael: ( getting up from chair) Hey sweetie, you still sick. Me: (fake coughing) Hey, mike, and yeah I just cant shake it, but whatâ??s going on here? Michael: nothing just finishing up, (looking at the director signal him over) Look I have to go, so why donâ??t you come by tonight and we can have dinner ok Me: Ok Iâ??ll be there. Michael: (smiling kissing me so passionately) I went over to where chairs were and sat down and as I watched Michael dance, I thought that I was falling to deep and he didnâ??t deserve a scum bag like me I wanted to run away so bad I couldnâ??t be here anymore, I felt someone watching me and when I looked over I seen one of Michaels stylist watching me scratch my neck and armsâ?¦I instantly stopped and ran out off of the set. When I got in my car I broke down I couldnâ??t take it know more when I looked down on my car mat I seen a little rock (crack). When I finished smoking it a drove off, I went to Janelleâ??s house. As I sat in front of her house I could only imagine how she could feel about me after the incident in the mall, but I had no one else to talk to. I rang the door bell and she answered. A few weeks after I called Michael called me none stop for 3 weeks. Me: Hey Nelle. Janelle: (rolling he eyes) What do you want. Janelle Mother: Janelle who is it? Janelle: Itâ??s Laurie mom, so why are you here. Me: (breaking down) J I need you im sorry about what I said I was completely wrong. Janelle: (studying my face) O.M.GSH Laurie are you using again, please say no. Me: Janelle, I didnâ??t know what else to do, Iâ?¦I couldnâ??t control things Iâ?¦.it was getting to bad. Janelle took me into her home, we went to her room and I told her everything, I told her about Michael, the drugs, Derek, and my father, she told me that I had to tell Michael the truthâ?¦ I couldnâ??t do that, he wouldnâ??t have understood what I was doing the drugs for. Janelle told me that if I explain everything to him then he would understand. Damn it she was right, half of me said tell him, and the other part said donâ??t say anything. The problem is I love Michael and if I told him he would hate me and how would I live with myself after that. When I left Janelleâ??s I promised her that I wouldnâ??t do drugs anymore, and that I would tell Michael everything. When I got home I called Michael about a hundred times. He never picked up. That night I never called Michael ever again. In fact after that night I never looked back I just lived my life for years like I was supposed to but as the years went on I still followed Michaels career. I am in love with this story omg I HOPE you guys like it to HOPEâ??Kylay
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